


Silence Passed The Southern Front

by TheyCallMeAnOtaku



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Armin still wants to see the ocean, Fluff, Imperial AU, M/M, Military Conscription, Mutual Pining, Not So Subtle Homophobia once Armin's mother knows, Slow Burn, Smut, Venting and Vulnerability, and Eren wants to get him there, flashbacks of abuse, mentions of abuse
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-05
Updated: 2021-02-20
Packaged: 2021-03-14 10:53:56
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,396
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29169903
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheyCallMeAnOtaku/pseuds/TheyCallMeAnOtaku
Summary: Young boys of sixteen years old are conscripted into His Imperial Majesty the Emperor's army, to serve a minimum of five years before returning home. Eren Jaeger, who is one of few boys who actually looks forward to getting conscripted, goes off and doesn't look back. Little does he know, however, that his future is intertwined with that of his prince.Armin Arlert is the only son of the Emperor, first in line to the throne, the soon to be 10th ruler of his nation. His father has always emphasized the ideals of love and acceptance for ones people, of all backgrounds. His mother, the Empress, would be a similar story, but she has never made any attempts to hide her contempt for same sex relationships. At first, this isn't an issue, but when Eren catches Armin's eye, he knows that it cannot be.
Relationships: Armin Arlert/Eren Yeager
Comments: 8
Kudos: 23





	1. Chapter 1

The rooster always crows just before dawn. As the son of a humble farmer, Eren is used to waking up early and tending to the fields. He finds it quite peaceful, really, the morning chill and the sky turning color. He loves seeing the wheat fields turn color as well; that moment just after sunrise when the light hits at the right angle... oh, you'd have to see it to believe it.

Tending to the farm also gives Eren adequate time to think. Grooming the horses and feeding the cattle has become so engrained into him at this point that he doesn't have to put much thought into it, which spares some space in his head for other things, such as his upcoming 16th birthday. 

His Imperial Majesty the 6th Emperor of Paradis signed into law that all boys of age 16 would be conscripted into the military. In times of war, this would be a way of hurriedly amassing forces, and in peacetime, this would stockpile the appropriate numbers needed for proper combat. Coming home alive from their first combat was considered to be coming of age. Their enemy to the south, the kingdom of Marley, forced the emperor to enact conscription.

It has been 100 years since then, and the two powers had agreed to a stalemate a few years ago. Right now there is no fighting, but everyone knows that the smallest mistake from either side would spark battles all along the borders of the nations. As a landlocked state, Paradis is at the advantage, with allies to the east and west, and Marley having nowhere to go but the ocean. Even with the allied kingdoms, it is still not safe to travel abroad. Marley has been notorious for sending spies into all neighboring lands, gathering intel and sowing fear into the common people. 

Be that as it may, however, Eren is excited to do his part for his nation and his emperor. In just one weeks' time, he will go to the military office in the center of Shiganshina, his home village, and receive his official orders to go and train to be a soldier. 

Eren knew his horse from the time he was a little toddler. His father, Grisha, taught him how to ride, and his mother, Carla, taught him how to care for it. The horse, named Redding, is quite the gentle one. His rich red coat and sweet brown eyes earned him his name. Eren often shortens it to Red just because it's easier to say. They go for rides together when the mood strikes Eren, when he needs to get away and think, or just be in nature. The mountain trails lead to all sorts of natural wonders, but Eren's favorite by far is the one that goes all the way to the summit of Mt. Maria, the guardian of the southern provinces. The mountain range extends all the way across Paradis' southern border, and effectively protects all the smaller villages like Eren's. 

It takes a day at most to reach the top, so Eren only goes up there when he knows he has enough time, which isn't often. Living on a farm means he must split the responsibilities evenly with his parents, and because he's much younger and stronger than they are, he does most of the heavy lifting. 

But luckily Eren has the next few days off. Half the cattle are being sold in the auction today, so the Jaeger family will get their biggest payout and the most slack they'll have all year. Eren tries not to be too sad in letting them go, it is much needed money for the farm after all.

The scent of horses and hay wafts through the stable as Red softly neighs in greeting. 

"Hey, Red. Wanna go for a ride up the mountain today?"

Red perks his ears up, almost like a dog. He loves going on rides with Eren, especially since they go out so few times.

"Yeah? You wanna go?" Eren prompts excitedly.

Red responds by pawing at the door to his stall, and nodding vigorously. Eren giggles as he opens the tack cabinet, and gathers the riding materials. 

It takes seven or so hours to reach the top, and every time they make it home Eren is always glad that he does extra cardio training for Red. Even though horses are hardy animals that can withstand the physical stress, Eren provides that extra few pounds of hay when they get home the next day. The view of the northern region up the mountain is worth the journey, though. Being so far from home, this is one of a few of Eren's safe spaces in the forests beyond the farm. He brought his notebook this time, and a few sharpened pencils to write and sketch with. 

He'd be lying if he said that going off to the military doesn't intimidate him a little bit. The kingdoms have been at a fragile peace for 100 years, and Eren is afraid that the war could resume within his time of service. When he leaves next week, it'll be five years before he comes home, if at all. After the required five years are over, you are able to choose if you want to continue for another five or return home. Eren is torn, and has been for a long time, about what he wants to do. With this in mind, he begins to write.

_Beloved gods of the world above, I beg you your aid. The time for the military is almost here, and I need you to guide and protect me as I walk this potentially perilous path. The world is vast, and much bigger than my nation of Paradis. I implore you to help me make the correct decisions, that I may protect my family, my nation, and my emperor. Help me to become a worthy soldier in your eyes, and let me lend my strength to the most noble cause I could ever ask to fight for._

_Your humble servant, Eren_

Writing out his prayers to the gods has helped keep his faith, because he goes back to read them when he begins to doubt. But Eren wonders if they'll let him take his notebook and pencils with him to training. 

The next day, Eren and Red make the descent down the mountain and back home. The view that the peak provides usually settles a calm in Eren's chest, but this time is different. A pound of lead sits in his stomach, and anxiety starts to set in. Red senses this, Eren can tell by the way he turns to look back at his rider. Red has always been an expressive animal, and it really shows in his face. Sometimes Eren wonders if he was human in his past life from the way they seem to just _get_ each other.

Eren smiles, and leans forward to brush Red's mane with his fingers. "It's all right, Red. I'm fine."

But Red doesn't seem convinced. This is one of those few instances where Eren can actually see the words flowing in Red's head: _doesn't take a genius to figure out that you're not fine._

Eren sighs to himself. "You're right, man. I'm not fine. I'm just worried about what might happen to us when we go off to the military."

The imperial army allows for conscripted soldiers to bring their own horses, if they have any, because they know very well that kids who grow up around horses already have strong bonds with them. It's much easier to allow ones own horse to come than have a soldier try to bond with a horse they don't know.

Evening falls by the time they get back to the farm. Eren gives Red his extra feed and puts his tack away, and he can feel a piercing gaze stabbing right through him. He turns in a panic to see Grisha leaning against the doorway to the house, his expression angry. Eren takes a deep breath in preparation for what's to come, and slowly makes his way into the house. 

"Hurry up, slowpoke! Do you think the military will accept such a lazy dog?!" Grisha shouts.

Eren picks up his pace, not wanting to test his dad. He keeps his eyes down as he crosses the threshold, but Grisha grabs Eren by the shoulder, effectively stopping him in his tracks.

"How many times must I tell you to look me in the eyes when you pass by me?" Grisha asks, dangerously quiet. His grip on Eren's shoulder tightens excruciatingly, but Eren does his best to not let it show. Grisha releases his hand, and Eren continues walking to sit at the dinner table, where he sees Carla sewing a hole in one of Grisha's shirts.

"Hey Eren. Did you have a good ride with Red today?" She greets.

"Yeah, the mountain view is always spectacular. I gave Red his well earned extra pounds of feed."

"Good, I'm glad. Be sure you don't work him too hard in the army, okay?"

"I'll try."

Dinner comes and goes in stiff silence. Despite the heaviness in his gut, Eren does his best to feed his growing self. He's gonna need it now more than ever, since his life is about to change forever.

When Eren goes to bed that night, he stares up at the stars through his window. It's gonna be less than a week now before he departs. Excited and terrified are essentially how he's feeling right now, but amidst the rush of emotions flowing through him, Eren can't help but notice a small voice calling out to him, saying

_The military isn't the only thing that will change you._

The fuck does that mean, "the military isn't the only thing that will change him"? Is it for good or bad? For better or for worse? That is such a broad statement to make and it doesn't make sense. In any case, Eren needs to sleep. He has a lot to prepare for.

* * *

The week goes by in almost a blur, and Eren wakes up to the rooster crowing. Having turned sixteen just a few days prior, it is now time to go into town and make his parents proud. He dresses in good clothes, hardly worn and in great condition. A knock at the door startles him a bit.

"Morning Eren! Are you up? It's almost time!"

He smiles. "I'm up, mom! I'm about to get packed!"

"Hurry! We need to be in town before noon and you have to get Red saddled up!"

"It'll be done in time, I promise!"

Eren pretty much stuffs his backpack with all the clothes he can find, and spots his notebook and pencils sitting on his desk. He carefully slips them into the side of the bag, not wanting to leave them behind.

The door to the outside is blocked by a stern faced Grisha, and Eren's stomach drops. For a long, tense moment, Grisha is silent before speaking.

"Don't disgrace the emperor with your boyish attitude. Now get out."

He moves aside to let Eren and Carla pass, Eren being sure to make eye contact this time. Once they're inside the stable, Carla begins to comfort her son.

"Don't let your father get you down about this. I know you've been looking forward to today for a long time, so don't let anyone try to talk you out of it." She finishes with a lingering kiss on his forehead, and Eren almost melts into her loving, motherly touch. Of all people he'll miss most, it'll be his mother. Carla was always there to tend to Eren's bruises and cuts, and hold him in her arms when he was too afraid to sleep. Eren does his best to memorialize the feel of her embrace; he knows he won't be around much longer to experience it.

"I'll miss you, mom. So much." Eren whispers.

"I'll miss you, too. Come back healthy and whole, do you hear?" Carla whispers back.

"I do."

The village is bustling with activity, and it's easy to see why. In the village center stands a table, and the person sitting there is the induction officer, Hanji Zoe. Everyone in the southern provinces know them. They're the one who comes every year to issue the orders to the new soldiers and befriend the townsfolk. Eren remembers them well. He'd always run up to them as a kid, introducing himself like he was already a soldier. Hanji would humor Eren and salute him back before they catch up for the year. 

Eren stands in line, with Red to one side and Carla to the other. Since Hanji is sitting at the table, the edge is taken off somewhat, but it still doesn't remove the intimidation that entering the military has.

When the kid in front of Eren has stepped away with his horse, it's finally Eren's turn and Hanji brightens up at seeing him again. 

"Whooooaaa, Eren! You're so grown up now! I can hardly believe it's your turn this year!"

He smiles bashfully. "Nice to see you again, Hanji. I'm ready to do my part."

"Excellent. And just so you know, it's Captain Levi's turn to look after the new recruits this year."

Captain Levi? _The_ Captain Levi? The man responsible for overseeing the protection of the entire southern region? Eren has always thought to himself that the emperor must really trust him to assign that sort of responsibility. Rumors are easy to spread in villages like Eren's, and he's heard many a tale of the great Captain Levi, who it is said bested more than a hundred soldiers in hand-to-hand combat training, all in a row. It is even speculated that he bested the emperor himself in hand-to-hand. The fact that he is Eren's overseeing commander is an incredible honor.

Hanji laughs, seeing the awe on Eren's face. "I don't blame you. Levi is quite the soldier. Paradis is lucky that he's on our side."

"I'll say," Eren responds.

Hanji points to the right, where there is a trail leading outside of town. "Go down that trail and follow it all the way to the end. The other kids aren't too far from here. You'll notice them immediately. That is where you will meet Captain Levi once everyone else has checked in. Are you ready?"

Eren takes a deep breath and looks Hanji in the eye, resolved. "I am."

Hanji smiles up at him and shakes his hand in a firm grip. "I'm glad that I can officially say welcome, soldier. Make your nation proud."

"I will," Eren states as he walks away. Before he crosses the village border, he turns back to look at his mom, still standing by Hanji, and waves. She smiles as she waves back.

"It's time, Red. Can you believe it? We're finally going off to serve the emperor." 

A few more kids roll into the group of about 30 recruits, and a soldier stands in front of them to call for their attention.

"Recruits from the village of Shiganshina! Welcome to the military! His Imperial Majesty the Emperor counts on you to keep our nation safe! Ready yourselves for training, and may the gods help you if you fail."

The group was already silent and listening, but you could hear a greater hush fall over them, as they all remember what the punishment is for dodging conscription: they are made into slaves for neighboring lands until five years pass them by. Those who come back from slavery never make it long. They either go missing or commit crimes to be sent to prison. Failure was considered a form of dodging conscription, because in past generations there were good numbers of kids who intentionally failed due to their overwhelming fear of death. This particular punishment was made into law some ten years after conscription; the numbers that the army was pulling was simply not enough to maintain their stature in war. It was a last resort enactment on the part of the emperor.

No one knows what happens to slaves while they're gone, but everyone who spots a former slave can tell that they've seen and experienced horrible things. Every time you ask, you're only met with silence and a stone face.

"And now, it is time to meet your overseeing officer. Gentlemen, I present to you Captain Levi Ackerman!"

Everyone turns their eyes to the man standing in front of them. Dressed in a clean, dark grey uniform with medal ribbons coloring his chest, Captain Levi slowly makes his way through the lines of recruits, who are keeping themselves as straight and proper as they can. Eren keeps his gaze on Levi as he makes his way closer. 

Levi stops in front of Eren, facing him directly. The captain's grey eyes meet his own green ones, and Eren hopes that Levi approves of what he sees. 

"Hopeful and proud eyes. That's what I like to see. Maintain that hopeful expression and it will take you far." Levi states, smirking slightly.

It's all Eren can do to not fall to his knees. _Captain Levi_ spoke to him, directly to him, and not only that, he _encouraged_ Eren's hope! _'Perhaps Captain Levi and I will get along just fine,'_ he thought to himself.

It seemed like an eternity before the captain walked back to the front of the group, where another soldier was waiting with his horse. He mounts his beautiful black steed, and addresses the entire group.

"If you have a horse, go ahead and mount. If you don't have a horse, ask one of your comrades if you can ride with them. Once everyone is up, we leave immediately."

Eren mounts Red, patting him twice as he does so. He looks around to see if anyone needs a ride, but there are only a few kids who don't own horses, and they've already paired up with each other. 

Levi turns toward the wide open expanse in front of them. "Recruits, your time as a civilian has ended. The emperor has need of you now. Train hard, train together, and always watch your back. Move out!"

The group of horses start moving forward, towards a new future. Eren takes another deep breath. _Here we go._


	2. Chapter 2

Three months pass by in a flash. Eren can hardly believe that it's almost summer already, but the tell of the season doesn't lie as he's standing at attention with the rest of his graduating class late in the evening, awaiting the arrival of Captain Levi. The heat of the day is slower to cool, and leaves the night rather comfortable. It was sheer luck that the graduating exam took longer than usual; one of the recruits made a near fatal mistake towards the end and Levi made him do it again.

The final grades are being tallied as we speak. The top five in this years group will be announced by the captain, and the entire list itself will be posted on the door to the main office. Eren can already tell he's gonna rank high, just by looking back at all the times that Levi would glance approvingly at him during, well, everything really. Knowing that he has the approval of a high ranking officer pushed Eren to train hard, even harder than his classmates, and he was determined to keep it that way.

You need a minimum of 70 points out of 100 in order to pass. If you get 65 or higher but lower than 70 you're allowed to stay an extra month to get your score up, but if you're any lower than 65 you're out. Few students in the past 6 or so years have fallen below that line.

But if you score higher than 90, that is your one way ticket to the post of your choosing. Some go to the capital city, others to the bases of the head towns in other provinces. Because of the nature of the exam, even fewer still get higher than 90. Once in every 15 years does a student achieve a perfect hundred. If, by some miracle, you do manage it, His Imperial Highness the Prince himself will bestow upon you your valedictorian medal. It's been rumored over the past few days that he's already here in the camp.

 _I wonder what His Highness is like,_ Eren wondered. Word has spread that the prince is not much older than the new recruits, and that he's already been put in charge of the imperial army. It's odd that a 16 something year old boy would already be given a huge responsibility like that, but then again, so is being the heir to the throne. 

A door opens and closes behind the wall of the stage, followed by footsteps. The air buzzes with energy as everyone knows what's about to happen. When Levi appears from the left side and takes his place at the center, Eren easily spots the clipboard that the captain is holding. He pays earnest attention to Levi, wanting to know if he made it into the top five.

"Soldiers! It has been a long three months, and I am pleased to see that we have no failing grades this year."

Relief sweeps the formation.

"All of you performed very impressively, but especially our top five recruits. For the first time in fifteen years, we have a valedictorian, with a perfect score of 100!"

Excited whispers pass through the soldiers, wondering who it is. Everyone knows it's not every day you meet His Highness.

"And now, without further delay, I shall announce the names of the top five. They are-"

Eren really tunes into this part, wondering where he stands in the rankings. He knows that he surely must have gotten _at least_ into the top ten.

"Number four, Eren Jaeger-"

 _'Yes! Number four! Not bad at all!'_ He elates inwardly. Eren hardly catches the names of the other three who came after, focusing on his placement in the list. _'I did it! I actually did it! I made it into the top five!'_

He doesn't catch the name of the valedictorian, but the young redhead was called up to the stage, and everyone notices the thin box that Levi is holding. Four guards in pairs of two stand at opposite ends of the stage, which can only mean one thing.

They are about to be graced with the presence of His Imperial Highness, the Prince of Paradis. 

If you're not from the northern provinces or aren't part of the governmental families of the southern provinces, you don't know what the prince looks like. Every government office in all the provinces has a portrait of the imperial family that is updated every year. But if you're a farmer like Eren or from a similarly employed family, you don't have easy access to that sort of imagery. Eren imagines that at this point, everyone's imaginations are running wild, trying to picture their prince in their heads.

A young figure gracefully walks across the stage, his features bright, expression peaceful, and posture befitting a royal. He isn't wearing his crown, instead he bears the necklace of the royal family around his neck. The redhead standing before him sweats bullets while kneeling, clearly concerned about whether or not he knelt fast enough. 

The prince only smiles, and- oh shit, that smile was actually kind of cute. Wait- _cute?_ _'If His Highness was to ever find out that you called his smile cute, he'd have your head for that, Eren.'_ Anyway, the prince turns towards Levi, who opens the lid of the box and steps forward. His Highness takes the medal out, and slips it into the collar of the kneeling redhead. He lays his hands on the valedictorian's shoulders, and utters a few words of congratulations.

"On behalf of the crown, I, Armin Arlert, 10th heir to the throne of Paradis, bestow upon you, Karl Gratz, the valedictorian's medal. Carry yourself with the honor and pride that this symbol presents to you. Congratulations, graduate."

His Highness then steps back, allowing Karl to rise, who then bows deeply one more time in gratitude and walks off the stage. The prince sweeps his gaze across the gathered soldiers, and Eren could swear that he and Armin lock eyes for just a split second. The prince looks to his right before meeting eyes with Eren again, who bows his head just enough to be noticeable. When he looks back up, Eren sees that Armin bowed his head in return.

_Holy shit, did that actually just happen? Did the prince just return my respect for him??? Oh no, knees, please don't fail me now!_

In an act of what had to have been subtle mercy, the prince walks off the stage and back behind the door he came out of. Levi dismisses the troops soon after, and Eren walks away to his barracks, still reeling about the fact that _the heir to the throne bowed to him in return._ That is such an honor that Eren would never have even dreamed of receiving.

* * *

It's no secret that Eren has had sleep problems throughout his childhood, but Eren hardly got any sleep that night, replaying that image in his head, unable to shake the awe of receiving mutual respect from one of the most important people in the country. But he needs to get himself together, 'cause today he gets to choose his post.

Some time later, after breakfast and packing his things in his bag, Eren was called to the main office to meet with Captain Levi. For a second there, Eren's insides shivered with dread before remembering that he placed fourth overall and that he would decide where he goes.

The valedictorian, Karl, makes small talk with Eren on the way.

"So what post do you think you'll choose, Eren?"

"I don't know. I was excited about being able to travel a lot during my service, so I think I'll head north into the middle provinces. But I'll take a look at my options and decide from there."

Karl's kind features turn thoughtful. "Smart move."

Eren takes the opportunity to find out the other side. "What post did you pick, Karl?"

"Me? I'm going to the head city of our province! I promised my parents that I would try to not be too far from them, and they make frequent visits to the city anyway." Karl beams.

The rest of the way falls into a not-so-awkward silence, much to Eren's relief. He's never been very good at making friends or maintaining relationships, so he's glad that the conversation dropped on a positive note. 

Karl stops at the door to Levi's office. "This is where we part ways. The captain is waiting for you, so go ahead in at any time. Oh, and something you should know: three other posts have already been chosen, and you can't go to the same post as one of your fellow top five, so if the post you wanted is taken, don't be surprised."

"Okay, thank you." 

Karl walks away, and Eren reaches for the doorknob to open it. He sees Levi sitting at his desk, looking over some papers. "Ah, Jaeger, come in. And close the door behind you."

Eren pulls the door closed and sits in the chair before Levi, who slides Eren the list of posts available for selection.

_Trost, Narheim, Markel..._

Trost is the head city of the centermost province of Paradis, and is considered to be one of the safest places to live besides the northern provinces and the capital city. Eren is surprised that one hasn't been chosen yet, especially given the locations of the other two.

Narheim is on the other side of Mt. Maria to the south, and is the head city of the province that borders Marley. Unsurprisingly, no one wanted this post, and Eren feels sympathy for the poor soul to choose his post after him.

Markel, even though it is in the western provinces, is considered one of the poorest in the entire nation. Outbreaks of disease are a regular occurrence, and the death toll is higher than any other province.

_I'm sorry, my fellow top ranking soldier, but I have to go with Trost._

"Have you made your decision?" Levi asks evenly.

Eren looks up. "I have, Captain. I wish to serve in the city of Trost."

"Very well. Pack your things if you haven't already, and get your horse tacked up. After the last soldier chooses his post, I will lead the team that heads out to Trost." Levi pauses a moment. "We will be passing through Shiganshina on the way."

Oh. Okay. Eren can handle that, can't he? Yeah, he definitely can. Surely he'd also be able to check in on his mom, right?

"I can see that you're conflicted. It's important to me as a captain that I get to know the headspace of my underlings. What's on your mind, Jaeger?" 

Eren didn't expect Levi to be so gentle like this. He's an incredible soldier for more reasons than one, that's for sure, but he doesn't know if he can trust Levi with the intimate details of his past. A simple summary should suffice.

"Well, sir, I didn't have the best home life growing up. My parents didn't agree on parenting strategies, and I grew to both fear and hate my dad. I'm concerned about my mother, since she was the only one to show me any sort of familial affection, something I desperately wanted from my dad. If it pleases the captain, sir, I'd like to be able to check on them?"

Levi's brow is furrowed, like he understands what Eren is trying to say, but his eyes display the empathy and sadness you'd expect of someone who knows that pain.

"Of course, Eren. My mother died when I was young, and I never knew my father. I raised myself until I was able to go off to the military. I will allow you the day we spend in town tomorrow to check on your parents, and if you'd like, I can go with you. But I'll let you decide when we get there."

The small band of soldiers broke camp at about midnight, approximately halfway to Shiganshina. Comprised of about ten soldiers, including Captain Levi, the team began their journey early in the evening to Trost. It's gonna be another few weeks or so before they get there, and Eren is already dreading passing through his hometown. But his curiosity about the state of the farm and his mother outweighs the pound of metal sitting in his gut. 

_'Come back to me healthy and whole, you hear?'_

_Don't worry, mom, I'm on my way. At least for a little bit._

At dawn, the captain blows his whistle loud enough to startle everyone awake. "Alright, everybody up! Disassemble the camp and let's get moving! We still have a lot of ground to cover before we get to Shiganshina."

Eren can hardly feel below his neck. His arms and legs tingle weirdly, and it's like he's watching himself take apart his tent in third person. More than once does he stumble and lose his footing, only to be off balance for another second when he catches himself. His tent neighbor looks towards him, slightly concerned.

"You alright?"

Eren looks up at him, a bit puzzled, but he replies anyway. "Yeah, I'm fine. Still trying to wake up."

The soldier's face melds into a smile. "The captain is merciless with that whistle, isn't he?"

"And here I thought I'd be used to it by now."

Every step closer towards town is another step in Eren's regret towards taking Trost as his assignment. Several times he wants to get Levi's attention, that the formation may stop and that he may go into the woods to bury himself in the ground.

They're coming up on the beaten down trail now, and even though he's only walked it once, Eren recognizes that this is the very same trail he took towards his future in the military. _Only the gods can help me now._

Shiganshina is bustling with people as always, since it's in the middle of a weekday and kids are running errands, women are selling fabrics and handmade goods, and men are trading crops and farm animals. A tattered and stitched beige hat at the far side of the crowd catches Eren's eye, and- oh hell no, it can't be. But he'd recognize that hat _anywhere._

Should it surprise him, really?

No. Because Eren is from a family of farmers, and this is what farmers do to make their living. They trade their best crops and youngest livestock, hoping to make a profit. Poor negotiator that Grisha is, he'd never brought much home. And now, it appears that nothing has changed.

Eren can't take his eyes off that hat, and apparently Grisha noticed the intent stare boring into him.

He and Eren lock eyes for a horrifying second, and Grisha's expression is as dull and angry as ever.

By the time Eren looks back to the formation, they're already halfway across town, Levi staying behind for Eren to catch up.

"Come on, Red, let's go!"

Red picks up the pace and they catch up to the captain soon after. Eren bows his head, eyes shut tight, wanting to apologize but knowing he's in the wrong is making the words die in his throat. Instead he waits for Levi to tear him apart.

"What happened, Eren?" Levi gently asks.

Eren can only look up and tell that story with his teary emerald eyes. He hopes his expression does enough of a job so that Levi doesn't ask anything else. Lucky for him, Levi turns away, leading him down a quiet street where their lodgings for the night are.

"Do you still want to see your mother?" Levi prompts again, sitting in Eren's room with him.

But now that Eren is here, in Shiganshina, he's no longer sure if he wants to go back home. It's past noon now, and Grisha never stays in the market for long after he gets there. More than likely he's on his way home now, drink in hand, small money bag in the other. But Carla...

Eren sighs. If he's going to go home, he'd rather have someone backing him. "I do, but uh, Captain, can I ask you a favor?"

"Of course."

"Can you... come with me, sir?" Eren mutters, staring at the wooden floor. 

Eren can feel Levi smiling down at him. "Sure. I'll keep a special eye on your back, I promise."

Now it's Eren's turn to smile. "Thank you, sir."

After tacking up the horses again, Eren leads Levi out of the inn's stable in the direction of his former home. They must pass through the town center again and go out on the paths towards the countryside in the east. The crowd has thinned a bit from all the people taking lunch in various parts of town, but it's still quite lively, as small bands of young kids run past the horses, waving _hi, soldiers!_ as they pass.

It doesn't take long before Eren is back down the dirt path that leads him back home. His fathers' horse stands tied to the post of the fence guarding the house, just inside the open gate. 

"This is the place?" Levi looks around, taking in the sight.

Heart in his throat, Eren pushes past it. "Yup, this is it."

They both dismount.

"I can stay out here if you want, watch the horses and listen from the outside. But I'll come right in if I hear a struggle, okay?"

Eren only nods, forcing himself to walk to the front door. _I'm home, mom. Healthy and whole. Just like you wanted._ He knocks three short times, and steps back to wait.

_This was a mistake, I'm sure of it. I should never have come back here. Dad will surely kill me, and then-_

The door opens. "Who's there?" Carla asks, sewing needle and thread in hand. But when the door opens fully and she sees who stands before her, she gasps in shock, dropping the contents in her hands and hugs Eren tight. He hugs her right back, cause by the gods he's missed this so much.

"I'm home, mom." Eren whispers into her shoulder.

"I know sweetie, and I'm so glad to see you safe." Carla pulls away with a beaming smile. "How long are you staying?"

"Not long, I'm afraid. I've been assigned to the city of Trost, and my comrades and I are only staying in town overnight. We leave first thing in the morning."

Carla's eyes droop with sad disappointment at hearing the news. Eren knows how she's feeling; just as soon as she'd gotten him back, she must let him go again. But they both know that this is the nature of the military, and for now they push that thought down. It's just as Carla's looking up that she notices Levi standing by the tethered horses.

"Who's that, over there by the fence?"

Eren turns to look behind him. "That's my overseeing officer, Captain Levi. I asked him if he'd come with me and check in on the farm."

Carla doesn't even attempt to hide her surprise. "And you didn't think to invite him in for dinner?"

"I- I mean- I didn't think- I didn't think dinner would be ready by now," Eren stammers.

"That's cause you hardly think ahead," a gravelly voice coldly states, and Eren's heart nearly stops.

"Dad."

Why does the scent of alcohol seem stronger now? Is it because Eren's been away for so long? Or has Grisha been drinking more than usual? Eren doesn't even want to think about the potential consequences it could have for Carla, or worse, the consequences it's _been_ having...

"I see the military is managing to make a proper man out of you, boy."

This is the closest thing to a compliment Eren has ever received from his dad in years, but why does it grind against his nerves? "Yes, dad. I graduated in the top five of my graduating class."

"Out of how many?"

"Th-thirty."

"That's pretty good though, getting into the top one-sixth of the entire class," Carla encourages.

But Grisha's already threatening eyes turn into a full-blown warning as he stares Carla down, making her look down and Eren step back. "I didn't ask you your opinion, Carla." He turns his gaze towards Eren. "What placement did you get? Five?"

"Four," Eren shoots back. _Better than you expected, I see,_ is what he wants to say, but Eren's sharp tongue is not nearly as sharp as his dad's fists. And he cannot afford to get beaten up before the long trip to Trost, especially not in front of the captain.

The captain, huh? If Grisha is in the presence of a military officer, then maybe, just maybe, the Jaeger family will have a civil dinner for once. Carla sees the budding mischievous light in Eren's eyes, and she pulls Grisha in the house to set the table. Taking his cue right on time, Eren walks back to the horses.

"How did it go?"

"It went as well as I expected. My mother noticed you and said I was free to invite you in for dinner."

"Tell her I couldn't possibly impose on a family reunion. I'd be out of place," Levi tries to deny.

"Suit yourself, sir," Eren turns away, "but my mom makes a killer pot roast, and judging by the scent, I would safely assume that's what we're having."

It's unusual for Eren to be so confident. This Eren has something up his sleeve. He can feel Levi smirking as he watches Eren walk away before deciding to catch up.

"It's a pleasure having you dine with us, Captain," Carla commented, placing the big pot of stew at the center of the table.

"It's a pleasure to be here, Mrs. Jaeger." Levi concurred. 

Grisha is off doing gods know what; Eren assumes that he's having a drink before he comes to eat.

"We won't stand on ceremony tonight, since we have an honored guest sitting among us. Please, go ahead and eat," Carla encourages.

Levi and Eren lock eyes, and Eren bows his head enough to be polite. "After you, sir."

It's weird seeing the captain be this hesitant, but Eren assumes this is the first time he's ever sat down to dinner with a lower class family, or at least the first time in a long time. Levi places the ladle back in the pot, and Carla insists that Eren take his share first. 

"Mother, please, I know I'm not the only one looking forward to this."

"Eren, just eat. You're going to need some hearty food before your journey. I'm not the one who's going. _You_ are, and you need some good fuel in you."

Can't argue with that, not that Eren was planning on staving off taking his share anymore. Besides, nothing comforts better than a home cooked meal, made with a healthy amount of a mother's love. The beef falls apart when Eren cuts a chunk off with the ladle, and that sight makes his stomach growl. Carla giggles a bit, and he knows what she's thinking: _'I knew it.'_ Eren makes sure to take some of the home grown vegetables, too: the potatoes, cabbage, and carrots. 

When he takes his first bite, Eren doesn't know how he's still breathing. It's even better than he remembers, and there is nothing in the world that could possibly top this. But he's oh so aware of the fact that with every up there must be a down, lifting his gaze to just beneath the shadow of the pot. The shifting of moods in this house runs like the trains that move through the capital province, and everyone notices when Grisha walks in the room, taking the only open seat next to Eren.

No one speaks when Grisha takes his food and begins eating. For a long moment everything stops, the silence at the table nearly deafening. Eren knows that Levi has most definitely noticed the shift in the atmosphere by the way he stares at the man in front of him, like he's sizing up a potential criminal. 

"So, Mrs. Jaeger, what sort of crops do you raise on your farm?"

"We grow the basic things, really. Potatoes, wheat, cabbage, carrots, and corn in the summer. In the winter we do our best to keep the soil unfrozen, but with the amount of land we own we are forced to cut down production by half. You may call me Carla if you like, Captain."

Levi smiles. "Likewise, you may call me Levi."

Grisha frowns. "All due respect, Captain, but I cannot allow a man of high stature such as yourself have his rank and his place," Looking specifically at his wife and kid, "go unacknowledged."

Levi's expression is unreadable. Eren knows something is about to happen, he can feel it.

"Whatever suits you best," Levi pauses. "Grisha Jaeger."

Carla and Grisha both sit there in unspeakable shock. Eren only keeps his eyes on the captain, also shocked to his core, but trusting him in his judgment for whatever comes next.

"I-I'm certain I haven't introduced myself," Grisha stutters, taking a passing glance at Eren. But Eren has only addressed his dad as just that, his dad, to Levi. He'd never spoken Grisha's actual name aloud, so the only way that the captain could possibly know-

"I remember you well, Grisha. You and I were part of the same graduating class when we went off to the military. But when we were assigned to the same post, you once said to me that you wanted to leave, and I could tell you were serious. When you failed to show up for dinner one night, I knew what I had to do."

Grisha sits there, absolutely mortified. Eren, on the other hand, has one hell of a lot of questions for Levi now. What was it that he knew he had to do? Is Levi from the same province as him? Is there a familial connection that Eren wasn't made aware of?

His father's mortification slowly turns to rage, his face twisting into the snarl that has Eren frozen to his seat in fear. 

"So _you_ were the rat..." Grisha growls through clenched teeth.

Levi only solemnly nods. "You of all people should've known what happens to deserters."

 _Captain, please don't say what I think you're going to say! By the gods, please keep yourself in check!_

"Don't you think your family deserves better? Instead of living the volatile life of a farmer, you could have owned a house in the city. You could have gotten yourself a good job that pays well."

Eren sighs in momentary relief, but Levi is really shaking up everything he once thought he knew about his dad. Abruptly, Levi stands.

"Perhaps I've said too much. But I do hope that I've given you something to think about." Levi stops before he opens the front door. "Eren, I'll be waiting for you outside."

The door closes, and the room feels like how Eren imagines the soil feels when you till it. He helps Carla clear the table, and walks out of the house without another word. She follows him outside, and Levi deeply bows at his waist.

"Mrs. Jaeger, I want to sincerely apologize for what I said to your husband. It was something I felt you should know, but clearly it wasn't my place."

Carla places a hand on Levi's shoulder. "Don't apologize, Captain. You did what you felt was best, and sometimes wounds need to be seen in order to heal. Perhaps you actually helped Grisha in some way, and he just doesn't realize it yet."

Levi rests his hand on top of hers. "You are too kind, ma'am. Eren is lucky that he has such a kind soul for a mother."

Both Eren and Carla sheepishly smile. "You flatter me, sir."

"I speak only the truth, my lady." And with that, Levi untethers the horses and mounts.

Carla turns to Eren. "It was nice to see you again, Eren, and meet your captain." She tightly hugs him, the way she did before Eren left, and he hugs her back with equal strength. "Come home safe again, okay?"

"Of course, mom. I love you."

"I love you too."

She steps back enough to let the soldiers go, and stays there to see them off. Eren waves one last time, and she waves back smiling, but he notices the single tear that falls from her eye.

"Captain?"

"Yes?"

"You knew my father?"

"Somewhat, yes. We were only acquaintances. Those were days where the military pulled recruits from all across the empire to train together. I came from the capital city, and your father... I don't recall where he's from."

Eren absorbs all this, connecting it with what Levi said earlier.

"Do you hate me now, Eren?"

"No, sir. I'm just surprised is all."

To Eren's relief, Levi lets a good chunk of the ride back to the inn pass in silence. It doesn't change the fact that he wants to ask Levi all sorts of questions, but he lets himself calm down from earlier.

When Eren gets back to his room, he locks the door tight and closes the window curtains. _What the hell happened tonight?_

It's only one question after another, none of them with answers. But one thing above all else _does_ have an answer. After years of wondering what happened to his dad, Eren got not just a clue, but also a direct marker into Grisha's past.

Let's back up and put all this into coherent context.

Levi and Grisha trained to be soldiers in the same class. Soon after graduating, they got assigned to the same post, and not too much longer after that, Grisha pulls Levi aside and tells him that he wants to give this up and run away. After failing to show himself for dinner, Levi knew what Grisha did, and reported it to their overseeing officer. 

What happens after that is only speculation on Eren's part, but he also remembers Levi saying that Grisha, of all people, should have known the consequences of leaving. He doesn't know what Levi meant by saying "him of all people", but there's only one possible explanation for the phrase "what happens to deserters". 

It all makes sense now.

Grisha was a slave.

* * *

**Yo! Welcome to my new fanfic! In case you're new here, the bold text you see is me, the author, speaking.**

**I am planning the chapters for this one to be moderate in length. It all depends on the material I decide to put in them and how far the story moves during them. This is also likely to be a long fic, this is a Slow Burn AU after all, and I want to be sure I do it right. I also want to be sure that the content is readable and ready to publish before I actually publish the chapters. Because of this, more often than not it will seem like I disappear into thin air, but fear not! I have written down some of the plot for the fic this time, and not too long after this chapter goes up, the next _will be_ in the works. I also have a one-shot still cooking and has been since God knows when, so do look forward to that!**

**Also, if you don't already know, I am a fledgling college student, and balancing homework and writing is a challenge. My fellow college student fanfic writers, I fully understand your struggle.**

**I am grateful to you for reading this. Thank you for giving me another chance after my first fanfic failed. I know it sounds like I'm ending it right here and I promise you I'm not, I just want you to know that I appreciate you and want to give you the best content I'm able to produce.**

**Have a good day/night wherever you may be, and I shall see you next time.**


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